The past two weeks

have sucked major ass hole!!!!!! Fi's mom went into the hospital on the 13. She was throwing up blood and they found a tear in her esophagus and a blood clot in her stomach. A few days later they found a huge varicose vein in her stomach, no bueno. I feel soo sorry for her. She's supposed to get released today to go home. She had a procedure yesterday where they put a shunt in to bypass the flow of blood to the varicose vein so that it will go down in size. I hope to god it works.

I've just super stressesd about that, and worrying about FI and how he's handling all of it. He doesn't talk about it and when I ask him he doesn't want to talk about it. So I just leave him be. I just think it's better to discuss it if something is bothering you, but apparently not him on this subject. ANy other thing, he'll tlak about but not this. One thing that worries me about him is that he doesn't tell his mom he loves her. She'll say it to the both us and I'll say it back, but he doesn't. I know he does, but I guess he's just not one to say it to his family. He says it to me all the time which I love,but I dont' know why it's soo hard for him to say it to them?? And I don't know if this is something that should bother or if it's something I should confront him about. He doesn't even give them hugs or anything he never has. His grandma told me he's been like that since he was little. I don't know why.

The wedding stuff is getting to me. I'm not doing boudoir pictures anymore which I'm really sad about. I just don't have that kind of money to spend when we need it for other stuff. Like rehearsal dinner, caterer, decorations, gifts for people, favors, invites, things like that. PLUS finding a place for us to live!!! UGGH a nightmare!!! I think we are just going to get an apartment in baytown and be done with it. Rent is sky high, but what can you do?? I woudl rather have a rent house, but they are sky high as well too. It friggin sux. THis economy sux, no one can buy houses so they have to rent which in turn allows the rentee's to put whatever type of pricetag they want to on the rental property!!! It's stupid and dumb.

FI and I did drive out to Liberty this past weekend, and we totally want to move there. It's the cutest little town that actually has a main street that surrounds the court house and then it also has the most adorbale homes ever!!!!! That's exactly what we want too!! it'll make my commute longer, but I don't care, i already drive 40 miles there and back, whats an extra 20?? Maybe by the time we move out there, I'll be working somewhere else anyways, who knows.

I'm sad I haven't barely been able to read any of my book I started a while back. I'm probably gonig to have to start over from the beginning so I can remember everything that I've already read.

I want to start on my DIY projects now. I want to get them finished and just be done with them. I think the reason I keep putting them off is because I keep thinking "oh i have time" blah blah whatever, stop procrastinating DAVIS AND JUST DO IT!!!! =) I'm a horrible procastinator, but God help me, I get my stuff done, even if it is last minute. but I don't want to be like that for the wedding. I want to have everything done so that I can enjoy it and not be stressed out about having to hurry and get stuff done!!!

I've got to get my happy butt back into a workout routine. I totally blame IKE for messing it up. I was doing sooo good!! Jogging like 3-4 times a week!!! I had even gotten up to 4.2 miles!!!! And FI was noticing and thats a HUGE plus to me!!! I have got to get back on it!! and it sux!! i'm stressing about how my dress may not fit, I am considering getting a corset put in the back so it'll be like that instead of zipped up. Maybe that iwll also help with the back fat issue too!! =)

Ok, i'm done =)

Books, Books, Books....

So I just finished my first book in a long time. It was highly recommended by a fellow knottie and Blogger. When she had said what it was about I knew I'd be hooked, and I was. The book is called "Dream When your Feeling Blue" by Elizabeth Berg. It's about these three sisters, The Heaney sisters and how they dealt with life and times during WWII. It was a wonderful book and I totally recommend it. I get so fascinated and caught up with peoples lives back then. I mean, the best paying jobs were working at the factories, which was hard grueling work, making 60 cents an hour, which apparently was verrry good money for then.

When it talked about the girls going to the USO dances and getting all dressed up, I just could imagine those were sooo much fun!! I would have loved to live back then!!! The lifestyles, the cars, the clothes, the jewelry, the way of life itself, is soo different than today and soo more real. People actually sat down and had family dinners EVERY NIGHT. Communities came together, to do what they could to rally the troops and support them in every way possible. They made victory gardens, donated bumpers from their cars for metal to make anything needed. Groceries were rationed, gas was rationed, everything was pretty much rationed. If you wanted a cake, you sometimes had to wait a week or so, cause eggs and flour just didn't come that easy.

I don't know if our country that we live in today could handle going through what the people of the 1940s went through, or even '30s for that matter. We take too many things for granted in todays society. Life was harder back then, I know thats true, but people learned to cope with it and move on and pull together. I sometimes imagine myself living back then. I know my FI would give anything to have gone and fought in that war. And I'm sure I would be one of the many woman, going to work in, dare I say, "slacks", working at a factory, or volunteerring at the hospital to take care of the wounded or joining the Women's Airforce Service Pilots(a.k.a. WASPs)....that's really what I would've loved to have done.

I would've loved to have flown for the WASPs back then. That would've been soo amazing. There were only a little over a 1,000 women who actually were WASPs and earned there lovely diamond wings. They had the cutest mascot too. Her name was Fifinella or "Fifi" for short. She was a character created by Disney (who in that time created many mascots and what not for the war, they can be seen on all types of patches for the men in the armed services), and she was sooo cute.

Anyways, I've realized now that I've gotten waaaay off subject. I always do that. Oh well, it's my blog! =)

I hope that I can find more books like this one. I love reading about life back in the 40's, during the war, and just hearing the stories from them, it just amazes me. If anyone knows of anymore, please let me know!! I would truly appreciate it!!!

The book I just started last night is about a jewish-german immigrant girl, who basically is on a quest to find out the truth about her families life before they came to America. I just started it and I haven't gotten very far, but I anticipate it to be wonderful!! =) I'll let ya'll know!!